I dreamed of a scene
In an old soldier's home,
The year was nineteen fifty three.
With medals galore that he'd won in this war,
He sat smoking peacefully.
“Tell me of the war of nineteen seventeen”,
Said his grandson who stood by his side.
“How did they fix up that terrible mix up?”
And proudly the old man replied:
"The Russians were rushin' the Prussians,
The Prussians were crushin' the Russians
The Balkins were balkin' and Turkey was squawkin',
Rasputin disputtin' and Italy scootin'
The Boches all bulled bolsheviks,
The British were skittish at sea.
But the good Lord I'm thankin'
The Yanks started yankin',
And yanked Kaiser Bill up a tree!"
My dream quickly changed to a schoolroom that day,
The lesson was geography.
A child raised her hand, said, "I don't understand,
This map looks all wrong to me.
What is this strange place that is marked Germany?"
And the teacher replied with a roar:
"Why, that's an old map, dear
Since we had that scrap, dear,
There ain't no such place anymore.
The Russians were rushin' the Prussians,
The Prussians were crushin' the Russians.
The good old Italians were hurling battalions
Canadians raidin' and Frenchmen invadin'
The Bulgars were bulgin' the Belgians
But Yanks started yankin' you see.
And when Peace was conceded,
Some new maps were needed,
They ruined the geography !
"The Russians were rushin' the Prussians,
The Prussians were crushin' the Russians
The Balkins were balkin' and Turkey was squawkin',
Rasputin disputtin' and Italy scootin'
The Boches all bulled bolsheviks,
The British were skittish at sea.
But the good Lord I'm thankin'
The Yanks started yankin',
And yanked Kaiser Bill up a tree!"
In an old soldier's home,
The year was nineteen fifty three.
With medals galore that he'd won in this war,
He sat smoking peacefully.
“Tell me of the war of nineteen seventeen”,
Said his grandson who stood by his side.
“How did they fix up that terrible mix up?”
And proudly the old man replied:
"The Russians were rushin' the Prussians,
The Prussians were crushin' the Russians
The Balkins were balkin' and Turkey was squawkin',
Rasputin disputtin' and Italy scootin'
The Boches all bulled bolsheviks,
The British were skittish at sea.
But the good Lord I'm thankin'
The Yanks started yankin',
And yanked Kaiser Bill up a tree!"
My dream quickly changed to a schoolroom that day,
The lesson was geography.
A child raised her hand, said, "I don't understand,
This map looks all wrong to me.
What is this strange place that is marked Germany?"
And the teacher replied with a roar:
"Why, that's an old map, dear
Since we had that scrap, dear,
There ain't no such place anymore.
The Russians were rushin' the Prussians,
The Prussians were crushin' the Russians.
The good old Italians were hurling battalions
Canadians raidin' and Frenchmen invadin'
The Bulgars were bulgin' the Belgians
But Yanks started yankin' you see.
And when Peace was conceded,
Some new maps were needed,
They ruined the geography !
"The Russians were rushin' the Prussians,
The Prussians were crushin' the Russians
The Balkins were balkin' and Turkey was squawkin',
Rasputin disputtin' and Italy scootin'
The Boches all bulled bolsheviks,
The British were skittish at sea.
But the good Lord I'm thankin'
The Yanks started yankin',
And yanked Kaiser Bill up a tree!"
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